Dealing with my Ex-Wife

Well, it's time for Cathee to start more shit with my family by posting more crap on her blog. This happens every now and then and usually I just leave it alone. However, this time I feel that a reply is needed.

Now, I would go reply on her blog, but she's turned off all replies unless you are a member of her blog. So I'll post my reply here and link up the original posts as well. My wife also gave out a response so I'll put in a link to that as well.

Click here to go to Cathee's Post from Tuesday.
Click here to check out my wife's comments.
Scroll down to see mine.

Well, Cathee decided to remove all of the posts from her blog, probably to hide them from her family. That way she can tell them any lie she wants. Luckily I have her posts copied locally so I can reference them if I need them. Just read the details below and everyone can then see how much of a pain this all was.



Cat's blog: And there was lots of anger and hurt to let go of. I had my whole world shattered because I put all my faith and love into one man and he let me down. I was blind sided by love was willing to do anything for the man even if it meant my own demise. But instead of working on our relationship or even giving me a clue that he wasn’t happy with the way things were going; he chose other routes for his life.

My Response: -And I'm much happier with my new choices.



And we all know Phil was mister instant gratification…I mean look at his track record…Two Misdemanor counts of Theft, Several Driving on a suspended License,

-These are matters of public record. So, back when I was in my early twenties I was a "self-connfessed" idiot. This was before we even dated. What's your point in bringing this up now?



Cheating on every woman he had ever dated. He cheated on Melinda while she was recovering from giving birth to his first child. He cheated on me I think more than once from all the things I have heard.

-I Would love to know what you've heard. Why don'y you tell us what you've heard? You seem to have no problem expressing yourself online. Come on, dish it out.



From the day he told me about the affair. And the way he told me about it. You would not believe it.

-Actually, everyone can read what happened that night. You catalogued the night I told you at http://www.geocities.com/darkhorseman2002/Chapter123.html. You used the name Roxy as yourself and I think you kept the evil husband's name unknown.

Well, Cathee has removed her story from the darkhorseman2002 page. Luckily, Google cached it. Check out this page to see her story about the night of the split.



When everyone thought I was doing well in reality I had become much worse by Christmas 2003. Which was the hardest time was Christmas Eve with the Young family.

-Why were you at my parent's house on Christmas Eve in the first place?



love the family so much and that Christmas I felt so out of place and lost. I barely ate and I barely talked. And When I saw all the kid’s stockings were up I broke down. As a matter of fact I broke down a few times. I was very hurt when Yvonne called while I was there.

-I called while you were there. It's my parent's house. I think calling them to tell them about their new grandson is kinda important.




She knew I was going to be there because I was told that she was told. And yet she doesn’t even have the common courtesy to wait till the next day to call or even say oh I’m sorry I didn’t realize she was still there I’ll call back.

-It's not really my problem or anyone else's problem about how you feel when my mom gets a call from her son. She is not your mother. That is not your family. It's mine.



Nope she on and on about what ever it was she needed to talk about. Talk about a disrespectful thing to do.

-Your whole post is disrespectful. But you probably don't see it that way.



And how awkward did it make Susie feel to be on the phone with Yvonne with me sitting right there well within earshot of what was being said.

-Then maybe you should have left the room if you were so concerned with how my mother felt; or left the house, or left our lives.



Any way That Christmas was the worst Christmas ever for me. The family that I had grown with and felt like they were my family too made the impact on me that They were no longer my family anymore.

-Yes, that is correct. They are not your family.



When Philip and I split we went through a whole series of stuff one was a question and answer session that I initiated. Here is copy of the whole email. Including my answers. Now mid you I know I sound desperate and crazy but my marriage was falling apart and I was willing to anything to save it.

-Of course, if you look at the date, we exchanged that email two weeks after the separation. Most of it was written as a private email between me and you. I answered you in ways to make you feel better. I wasn't going to tell you what I really thought at the time and hurt you even more. Now, you want to bring everything out into the open. Why didn't you post all the emails? Or all of your asinine one-sided divorce proposals?



15. Do you really want to end our marriage without trying work throughout differences?

Phil: Yes, I've been thinking about that for weeks. I know it may be shocking to you, but I am not changing my mind.

Cathee: FIRST OF ALL I WANT TO WORK THROUGH OUR DIFFERENCE FOR 2 MAIN REASONS. AS FAR AS OUR MARRIAGE (SO I CAN SAY WE TRIED EVERYTHING BEFORE WE GAVE UP) AND FOR TONY'S SAKE. HE'S VERY CONFUSED AND VERY HURT AND OUR DIVORCE WILL EFFECT HIM VERY DEEPLY IT COULD LEAD TO RESENTMENT AND ANGER. BUT YOU DON'T EVEN WANT TO TRY THAT IT'S OBVIOUS NOW. AND IT'S A SHAME.

-A husband and a wife that stay together purely for the sake of any children is a marrage that is doomed to fail. Staying together to make sure we don't hurt some outside, third party like Tony, or other friends and/or relatives is also a marriage that is doomed to fail.



17. Would you ever want me back in your life? & Why?

Phil: I don't hate you, and I would like you to stay in mine and Tony's life. I don't know how that would effect you to see all of that from the outside.

Cathee: FROM THE OUTSIDE IS KINDA WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO PHRASE WHAT I'M THINKING ON THIS ONE SO I'LL GET BACK TO IT ANOTHER TIME.

-Yeah, I said you should stay in my and Tony's life but that was before all the crap that my family and I have had to put up with you. I would rather you just get the hell out of our lives altogether and leave us alone.



18. Do you want me to just go away?

Phil: I don't want you to just go away, but I do want you to realize that things are not going to be just like they were no matter what I do.

Cathee: I DO REALIZE THAT I JUST DON'T WANT TO BE PHASED OUT OR SHUT OUT. I WANT US TO GET ALONG AND I WANT TO GET ALONG WITH YVONNE AND HER KIDS. I ALSO WANTED TO BE SURE THAT EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE GOING THROUGH ALL OF THIS THE SAME AS I AM WE NEVER TELL THE OTHER TO GET OUT OF EACH OTHER'S LIVES.

-Changed my mind. Definitely get out of our lives. Please.



20. Am I eventually gonna meet Yvonne?

Phil: I'm sure you will.

Cathee: GOOD I LOOK FORWARD TO THAT I WOULD LIKE TO GET TO KNOW HER A BIT. I WOULD LIKE FOR HER AND I TO BECOME FRIENDS.

-I doubt you will ever be friends with Yvonne. I'm sure Yvonne does not want to be friends with you, nor do I think it's a bad thing to keep the two of you apart. It seems that every time you open your mouth you say something stupid and that would not bode well for any friendship that you have with me, Yvonne, or anyone.



So even though our marriage was ending we were still on very friendly terms and things stayed that way with neither of us fighting or bitching at each other until the actual Divorce started.

One of the more interesting things about our Divorce was the timing issue He bitched about it taking so long when he’s the reason it took so damn long. We separated in 06/2003 and he filed for divorce in I think 11/2003. and we settled the Divorce in 9/2004 Why did it take so long for him to file you may ask well….

-Yes, I filed in November 2003. Why didn't you file? Why did it take 10 months to get everything settled? Maybe because your lawyer was an idiot? Maybe because you wanted more than you deserved? Maybe because you put through idiotic lists of what I owned but never really ponied up a complete list of what you own or have? I'm sure all of these things were factors for causing the divorce to go so long. If you were so damn impatient, then maybe you should have filed. No, instead you complain on the web about all of this. Typical "poor me", whiney, bitchy mentality that you have always had. And you wonder why I divorced you?



After the divorce things got hectic in my life and eventually I decided to start a blog. this is when I was confronted by Yvonne in a blog format. I tried very hard to just be a fly on the wall and not approach her.

-If you only would have left her and me alone in the first place, none of this other crap would have happened. But you had to pretend to be someone else and start writing emails to Yvonne. Darkhorseman2002@yahoo.com was so much bullshit.



But when she made comments about on my initial Blog entry. I was furious.

-Then don't read her blog if it angers you so much.



But I didn't want to fight with her or anyone. I was dealing with so many things at the time that I really didn't want to start a fight with someone I didn't really know. Actually I wanted nothing to do with her to begin with. So I changed my blog. And as time went on and things seemed to calm down. At one point I was trying to deal with Car payments and such and I had been forced to Contact Phil about a late payment or risk having my Car and his Repossed.

-You've got your dates totally off. Yvonne's first comment on her blog about you was on March 28th. Your stupid car payment email was on March 16th. Did you travel back in time or something? Maybe you're thinking of some post on Yvonne's blog that had nothing to do with you?




This sparked a reaction from her. I did not want to fight with her so I ignored it. But as time went on the fued began. And over the last Week or so I made the desicion to alter my Blog so no one but members can comment on it.

-And oddly enough, you have no members so no comments. Was that your intention?



thus giving me the freedoom to work through what I needed to work through.

I don't really know Yvonne however, by her actions and the things she has said it seems to me that she likes to pick on people who don't fit into her plan or her world.

-You're right, you don't know Yvonne at all.



I know she hates me for some reason.

-Some reason? Every time you open your mouth you seem to have something to say about her, about me, about our failed marriage, etc. Then you wonder why she dislikes you? Idiot!




At least that's the impression she seems to have given me about it. I could be wrong about her and I sure hope that I am. But the to be honest she was the whole reason I changed the format of my blog. I started this blog so I can openly express my thoughts and feelings. And to work on new ideas and new concepts for stories for the book without people purposely putting me down for what I want to say.

-I'm sure if you stop talking about me, my family, and our marriage, we would leave you alone.



I rarely get feedback on things unless it's from her

-Well, since you have no members I guess now you're getting feedback from no one.



And the smart ass rub it in your face attitude that she display shows up over and over again. She even gets Phil Involved with his comments and such.

-You opening your big mouth about me and my family got me involved.




Normally I wouldn't give a damn about what people say but the way the two of them go about it when it comes to me is horrid. They're like vultures. I don't want her to comment on my blog neither Do I want Phil to make comments on it.

-Stop talking about us and we will gladly stop commenting. If you continue to talk, we will continue to comment.



I had originally hoped that Phil & I can still be friends after the Divorce But I now see that he doesn't want that.

-You and your stupid crap you keep pulling saw to that.



And that's too bad. But his loss is some else's gain right! Phil & Yvonne to me are what I call toxic personalities all they do is expose my weak side, hurt my feelings, piss me off, be little and beat my ego to shit. And then pour salt in the wound and just sit back and laugh like they enjoy hurting me over and over again.

-Yeah, we just love it when you decide it's time to play the bitch again. It gives us a good laugh for a while. This comes around every couple weeks.



What did I do to them to deserve this?

-Do I really need to go over the list? Send emails as fake people to my wife. Drag the divorce out longer than needed for no reason. Make stupid insulting comments on your blog about me and my family. Should I continue?



It reminds me of the tourture that was my youth in Coal City. And those wounds will never heal if you keep on picking at them.

-Stop putting yourself in situations where you might get insulted and attacked and people will stop attacking and insulting you.



What they remind me of at this point is a couple of bullies. and I know I am not as strong as I once was. I'm far from it. So I try to protect myself as best I can. I have a long way to get back to being that strong after falling apart like I did. But I'm working on it every day.

-Every day you try to find a new way to get to me and my family? But I thought you were moving on.



This Blog was created so I can be me somewhere and in a way where I best express myself. Writing.

-Then write. But when you make comments about me and my family, then expect feedback. You'll get it every time.



Now it sounds odd but I am a Dyslexic writer with bad grammer and really bad spelling who prefers to write almost every day. And if you must comment about this whole thing on your own blogs Please take my feelings into consideration when you do.

-Why? You don't take ours into consideration when you write.



Because I am not a machine, I am a woman whith a heart and a soul.

-No, I think of you more as a heartless, cold, calculating bitch.



And I really don't want to fight with anyone anymore.

-Then shut your mouth when it comes to me and my family.



I'm just trying to live my life. That's all I have been doing all along. I'm just too tired of fighting over stupid petty crap.

-Then shut up already!



So if your going to tear me apart go for it. But please have the same cosideration for me as I have had for you.

-No consideration at all? No problem, I can do that.



I don't try to mock you or make fun of you in my blogs.

-That's the biggest load of Bullshit in this entire post!



All I'm trying to do is sort out things and get through my thoughts and my feelings in a way that works for me. I no longer have the energy to fight unless I'm fighting For Chris, My family (this includes Tony), Chris's Kids and my Friends.

-The only thing you could call Tony is your friend. He is not your family! You are not now nor were you ever his mom. He's got 2 dads & 2 moms. That's it.



That's why I wrote this whole post so everyone can see what I have been through during my separation from Phil and eventually my divorce. I am grateful that I have been able to close the book on my life with Phil

-You keep talking about it. Still looks open to me.



and have opened a new book on My Life...I have even already started the next chapter of my life with Chris. And I have never been happier. I thought that When I split with Phil that I would never find happiness. I was wrong. When I first started talking to Chris I found someone who was alot like me and alot different than me at the same time. He was very interesting and very deep at times. And I fell in love with him before I even knew I was really in love with him. He has opened my eyes to a whole new world. and continues to amaze and excite me every day. I never thought I would feel this way. but I'm glad I do. I can't even describe how deep my love for him is. But more on that another time......

Coming up later next part 2 of Cleaning out the cobwebs of life….or I’m getting older.

-Oohhh, there is more? We wait with baited breath.